Friday, December 17, 2004

I am satisfied!!!??

Hmmm...so finally after a whole week someone called! Its so relaxing to know that afterall you are not alone! Someone thinks about you!

Surprising though..but for a change Karthik also called! It was nice to hear from him..had always been in my circle of close friends! The other day Kannu also called!

I know I am doing something which will finish the gang that we had! But I cant help but feel sorry for all this! Its not I ever wanted myself..but then things happen and you just face them!

I dont know if my reply was the one I should have given! I guess..it brings things back to square one! Sometimes I think I'm not trying hard! But is it??

Did others try hard enough?? did I ever get a chance to rectify my mistakes?? I was belted mercilessly without even getting a chance! Wasn't the decision just put on me?? Was it ever a mutual decision??

How muchever you say that you tried...but did you really do that?? doesn't this show that you are not taken seriously? Never bothered to work out together!!

Hey!! You were supposed to be satisfied?? Weren't you??
Ya..but then when will I crib? And I'm not cribbing to anyone..its me and me alone!!


I know..may be this is the reason -- I keep hurting people..people who matter to me!
If they want to move on...let them do so..let them be happy!! why drag them back??

But then, why do I have to move on?? I dont want to... i'll stay where I'm!!
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I must go and eat!! Its been 3 days..I have had only breakfasts... no meals ..no dinners..
I cnt live on junk! I must eat!! But I dont feel like eating nor i'm hungry! Let's see!!

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i never knew I could write so much and so frequently! I never knew myself!!

Why should I complain about others when I dont know my ownself!

Its really good to write everything you feel! Aparna was right in writing everything on paper..it relaxes you..soothes you..

I'll write more often..
And I cant do much else having chosen this loneliness myself!!

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