Friday, May 13, 2005

Marriage!!

He is getting married and I can't just stop laughing by the very thought of it!

He is so badly terrified himself, by the mere thought of it, and yet, somewhere deep down is as excited as well! Parents can be such a factor sometimes, they master the art of emotional black mailing! And his parents must have won an oscar in it. The fact that this stupid, weird, and almost a jerk could be trapped by that is the biggest testimony to it!

And what's worse, this miser has been spending a fortune of money over the last 2 months in his personal interviews. Ya right, he has been attending one interview almost every week since last two months, where the girl's parents fly down from wherever, meet him over lunch or coffee, ask him all sorts of uncomfortable and selfish questions. And if all this wasn't enough, he's the one who pays for this!!

He is Deepak Goenka!

Coming back to marriage, apart from the fun and excitement that the word generates, it's a whole lot more!

It's a lifetime commitment, a proof that you have matured enough. Your one yes to it, means you know what life is.

Marriage is a dream for anyone, specially for girls. It's a whole new life for you, where you have a new partner in your life, and it's your responsibilty to take care of him/her. Being a guy, I can think from my viewpoint, and I feel it's such a delicate relation. The bride leaves all her relatives, parents, lifestyle, friends, her house, her background and comes to live with a guy, whom she probably hasn't known for a considerable time. She must be afraid, she must be terribly sad, she must be terribly missing her parents and her past. Yet she must be excited, she must be having dreams, she must be having hopes that the new family for whom she has planned to devote all her love would love her equally, the man whom she has trusted to the extent that, for him, she has left everything behind, would love her equally and would stand there as her support and ideal, he would be her true friend.

He would understand that she expects the same respect and care from him for herself, her family and friends, that she is expected to offer. That he would be forgiving and understanding. That he would be compassionate that it's for the first time in her life she has been given some responsibilty, that she has the load of hopes and expectations from her family, her husband's family and the whole society. That she has a new household to build, nurture so many new relations... and in this course she is bound to err, for she is just a small girl who just a few days back was a pampered child in her home, and now has this whole new world in front of her.

And how many of us guys at this stage of our life are mature enough to think about these? How many of us are ready to accept and adapt as much as the girl has to?

I have seen the excitement in this friend's eyes, and I have seen him worried too. But I don't think he's worried about all this! He is worried because he has to feed a new member in his family, he's worried because he would loose his freedom, he's worried because he doesn't want this responsibilty at this stage, he's worried because he isn't financially secure to start a new family.

All his worries are justified, yet he needs to worry about life from the girl's viewpoint too, and then decide, if he can ever be so understanding, because all his worries, would be answered in a couple of years, but the understanding of the true meaning of marriage might take a lifetime!

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